


Maybe I Deserve

by JasnNCarly



Category: One Life to Live
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-07-22
Updated: 2012-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-13 18:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15370434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JasnNCarly/pseuds/JasnNCarly
Summary: Matthew gets what he deserves.





	1. Chapter 1

**~*~Process~*~**  
  
They had fallen into a routine, one where Destiny thrived and left Matthew confused in the distance.   
  
His life was Drew, and he had little direction outside of spending time with his son; Bo and Nora insisted he rehabilitate, take some time to recover from the chaos of the past year, but it left him feeling stifled.   
  
What kind of example could he be when he had no future to speak of?  
  
Destiny was the one he would turn to, talk about every doubt and fear he had, yet she had become unavailable – too afraid to let him close again.  
  
 **~*~Protest~*~**  
  
“Is he ready?”   
  
Her smile was forced, and her overly polite tone warned him to steer clear of the conversation he longed to have with her; Matthew stepped aside, signaling for her to enter.  
  
“Drew should be up from his nap soon.” Matthew closed the door, offering her a smile, “Rough day, Des?”  
  
Her frustration was evident, yet she fought to restrain it, “I flunked my test, all right? I have to get home and hit the books harder.”  
  
“I can’t take your test, but I could help, you know?”  
  
“I’m not giving up any rights or time with Drew.”  
  
 **~*~Pitch~*~**  
  
“Really? You’re gonna use my horrible grade to talk about this again? Matthew, it’s a bad idea.”  
  
“Says who?”  
  
“Says the fact that neither of us have jobs. I’m going to school full-time, you’re still rehabilitating, and we have a baby.” She fell into a seat on the couch, sighing heavily, “Or the fact we cannot have a conversation about anything outside of diapers and formula without arguing.”  
  
He pressed on, occupying the space beside her, “Living with me doesn’t have to be a punishment, Des. It could be the thing we need to get back to where we were.”


	2. Chapter 2

**~*~Solve~*~**  
  
Destiny bored her eyes into his, her voice cracked upon confession, “We could never be what we were; things are  ** _too_** different.”  
  
Matthew stopped himself from touching her, aware of the barrier between them, “We don’t have to get a new place, all right? We could stay with my Uncle Clint. My parents wouldn’t like it, but they’d get over it once I explained this was our way of parenting Drew. My aunt Viki would love to have family in the house since the house is empty.”  
  
“I don’t want to be anyone’s burden.”  
  
“That’s something you could never be.”  
  
 **~*~Solid~*~**  
  
“You’re a Buchanan too, whether you wanna be or not.”  
  
Destiny had to smile at this, leaning her head against the back of the couch, “Is that right?”  
  
“Yes, as Drew’s mother and my,” He paused, using his eyes to implore her to accept the sincerity of his words, “best friend who I miss.”  
  
“You should.” She crossed her arms across her chest, “It still isn’t a reason to get caught up in each other’s lives again. I can’t do things for anyone but me and Drew now. Not even for someone who I considered my best friend. I’m sorry.”  
  
 **~*~Separate~*~**  
  
Matthew hated the way Destiny managed to look beautiful without trying, her full lips parted for a small sigh as she tucked some of her brown locks behind her ear; she was a tower of emotional strength whose physical features only became more defined after their child’s birth.  
  
“I’m going to start working with my uncle Clint again.” He spit out the words before he could edit them or verify their credibility, causing her eyes to widen, “If you need me, that’s where I’ll be from now on.”  
  
“Or in case I change my mind?”  
  
“ ** _Just_**  in case you do.”


	3. Chapter 3

**~*~Waiting~*~**  
  
“You didn’t have to do this.”  
  
“Do what? I ordered pizza and set Drew in his high chair.” Matthew handed her a napkin, his heart fluttering at the sight of her sideways grin, “How’s school going?”  
  
“The teacher’s giving me an extra credit assignment, some speaker on campus.” Once he had a mouthful of food, Destiny went on, “You wanna go? Shaun offered to babysit.”  
  
Matthew walked on eggshells around the Evans family, but the invitation had been carefully considered – that much was evident in her avoidant eyes; she had planned this. Too afraid he’d make things awkward, he smiled.  
  
 **~*~Wiggle Room~*~**  
  
There were a few students he recognized; everyone else was completely foreign to him, though they looked his age and carried themselves the way he imagined he would had his life not veered off the well paved path.   
  
He sat beside his best friend/baby’s mama at the guest-speaker event; once the speaker took the stage, discussing the changing image of the nontraditional student, Matthew felt his heart sink into his gut.   
  
Destiny hadn’t invited him to be her ‘date,’ she invited him along for the message.  
  
She wanted him to return to school, to his life beyond her and Drew.  
  
 **~*~Weary~*~**  
  
Matthew wanted to focus on anything outside of an argument; yet she was desperate to discuss. Organizing his thoughts with a deep breath, he squeezed the steering wheel, “Why are you the only one who gets to help? It’s always been that way.”  
  
“Excuse me?”   
  
“You get to drop subtle clues about what I should do with my life, yet you can’t accept one suggestion I make.”  
  
“There’s a huge different between moving into together and supporting each other’s education.”  
  
“Fine, “Matthew pulled the car over to the side of the road, “Then let it’s time to make a deal.”


	4. Chapter 4

**~*~Tape~*~**

“Did you put enough on these boxes?”

Though the day was full of frustration, an unusually hot day to move, Matthew couldn’t help but smile; he had gotten his way – Destiny was going to stay.

“I’m not sure I need all this stuff to stay here for a few months.”

“Are you that sure you’re going to hate it, Des?” 

Destiny caught his faint smile, looking around the large room they had set up for her, “It might be all right.”

Matthew moved to stand beside her, taking her hand in his and offering a small smile, “It’s gonna be great, you’ll see.”

**~*~Testing~*~**

“They weren’t happy about it. Wanted to know why it had to be here, had to be with you.”

As if Matthew needed help gaining hate from the Evans family, he’d made this deal with Destiny and gotten her to stay with him.

While Drew slept upstairs, the baby monitor planted firmly on the coffee table, they continued to talk. A welcome change to the past few months as their work demonstrated some limited success.

“But I’ll tell you what I told them. Drew is our son, and this is our family. We’ll decide, together, what’s best for our son.”

**~*~Tension~*~**

“Hey, Des, I got some blankets if it’s a little—”

He had not knocked before entering her bedroom, leaving him to find her emerging from the bathroom in an oversized t-shirt and her hair down. In the simplest moments, Destiny still had not the faintest awareness of how she robbed him of all common sense.

“I see we need to establish some ‘house;’ rules, huh?”

“I’m sorry. I just—this place gets kind of cold sometimes and I—I wanted to make sure you were covered.”

“That’s sweet but unnecessary. Now, get out.”

“Yeah, of course! Um, I’m sorry.”


	5. Chapter 5

**~*~Behavior~*~**  
  
Matthew had no clue how he could be living with Destiny and seeing her less.  
  
While he loved his time with Drew, found that his son was even mimicking his mannerisms, Matthew worried he was missing the punch line yet again.  
  
Maybe he was around too much for her, maybe he had no right to ask for her time, he deserved to remain simply her son’s father; the slight appeal of being her best friend lingering somewhere in the air.  
  
Matthew could not help wanting a future with her even as she seemed to be building one separate from him.  
 **  
~*~Books~*~**  
  
School demanded more and more of her time, leaving him to put Drew down for the night as she crammed for exams during finals week.   
  
Returning to the living room, he found Destiny in a slumber; her head thrown to the back of the couch, her textbooks stacked in her lap, and a loud snore escaping her.  
  
Matthew tiptoed to her, removing the books from her; he placed them on the coffee table, mindful not to lose her place. Curling an arm under her legs, his arm wrapped around her shoulder, he adjusted her to a clearly more comfortable position.  
  
 **~*~Buzz~*~**  
  
Her nightmare was the blaring alarm clock, missing class; it alerted wake up; it was dawn when she glanced towards the windows.  
  
Still time.  
  
Destiny ran her hands through her hair, glancing at her textbooks nearby and frowning.   
  
There she was, her limbs extending the couch and a soft blanket enveloping her body; yet she couldn’t remember setting herself up.  
  
Rubbing her eyes, she glanced at the other side of the table to see a breakfast tray awaiting her – a small note beside the orange juice.  
  
 _I took Drew to visit with Shaun. Good luck on your tests. - Matthew_


End file.
